Sunday, 22 November 2009

  • Key

    As I inch ever nearer to the closing date on my house, my sentiment evolves from the jitters to cold feet to blatant panic.  The responsibilities of owning a house are staggering, and I'm not even sure I'd be able to handle a task as simple as mowing my lawn every week.  It's also a nidus of excitement, the lure of an independence and a self-reliance that wanted as long as I can remember; it also changes my behavior and brightens my mood.   As much as I doubt myself, I am salivating for the chance to challenge myself and to change again.  Change: that is the nature of things, is it not, my lovely readers?  Whether to vacillate between arbitrary self-eviscerating extremes or to metamorphose, larva to crystalis to adult to death, a man's capacity for change is the length and breadth of his existence.  And each man, on a few and far between shiny days of his life, turns to the sky vis-a-vis to proclaim himself.  It's my day.

Tuesday, 17 November 2009

Saturday, 26 September 2009

  • I Boughts Me a HOUSE!

    I haven't written an update in a while.  Now, now, there's no reason to get mad.  Don't yell at me.  I probably won't listen anyway.

    See, not only did I buy a house, lovely readers, I bought a house in Guilderland, one of the richest neighborhoods in Albany.  I'm not very pleased about paying Guilderland school taxes, but value and resellability of this neighborhood more than make up for it.  I'm looking at some serious profit once Obama gets the hell out of the white house.

    I'm about two months away from closing, and it's crunch time for the mortgage application.  Piles and piles and piles of papers to sign, most of which, I don't even read.  Piles from the real estate people, piles from the mortgage company, piles from the home inspectors, piles from my attorney, piles from the government.  If I see one more document about carbon monoxide regulations or water table laws in Albany county, I'm going to hurl some rocks.  Can't I just write a damn check and grab the keys?  Whatever.  Buying a house is a long and painful process.

    But owning a house, however, is incredibly sexy.  All those jackasses who told me I'm way out of my league when I said I was going to buy a house are flabbergasted at my 1300 square feet three bedroom two full bath fully updated ranch with brand new monderized center-stove ceramic tile kitchen,  walk-in closet, sliding glass doors, brand new deck and spacious half-acre back yard. 

    Behold, my brand new tiled roof and vinyl siding, bitches, and weep.

Tuesday, 01 September 2009

  • Week 9? I lost count.

    The benefits of being on night float:

    1. The opportunity to wear a skin-tight muscle shirt and scrub pants in the hospital.

    2. Not having to dictate discharge summaries.

    3. Cancelling clinic.

    4. Less work.

     

    The detriments of being on night float:

    1. Vampiric lifestyle.

    2. Cleaning up the mess made on someone else's patients.

    3. Four admissions in a row at 3:30am.

    4. Getting paged relentlessly for really stupid things.

Saturday, 15 August 2009

  • I'm a Doctor Now (5).

    Dear Ortho,

     

    I don’t tell you how to put in rods and screws; therefore, keep your grubby paws off my patient’s beta blockers and insulin and stop prescribing massive doses of motrin and toradol to patients with stage II-III renal failure.

     

    Thank you very much.

Monday, 03 August 2009

  • I am a Doctor Now (week 4!)

    I am sooooooo tired, but I survived a long, drawn-out month of CCU!

     

    100_0114

    See? See? I'm still smiling.... At least I was for the ten seconds it took to take that picture.

     

    So let’s review a couple of the things that my doctoring skills have brought forth:

     

    1.  76 year-old female with a past medical history of Diabetes, Hypertension, Chronic obstructive pulmonary disease, coronary artery disease status post Coronary Artery Bypass graft five years ago, Class III systolic congestive heart failure with an ejection fraction of 30%, presents with altered mental status, bradycardia, and bradypnea.  Her medications included, but were not limited to, Aspirin, Carvedilol, Lisinopril, Amlodipine, Lipitor, Coumadin, digoxin, Lasix, and hydralazine:

     

    And she was like:

    No, seriously, I shit thee not,

     

    So I was like:

    digbind
    $5000 Miracle on yo ass!

     

    And, within two hours, she was like:

     

    Hells yes.

     

     

    2.  You know how they all say one never ever ever sees the classic EKG pattern for pulmonary embolism?  Well, they are all wrong:

     

    s1q3t3

    Yesh, finding this baby got me a whole lotta nurse-love.

     

    And that is the actual EKG.  Recent fracture, resting dyspnea, oxygen-remediable hypoxemia, frothy blood-tinged sputum, Q1T3S3, new RBBB, caved T waves in anterior leads Cu-Lass-ICK.  I dropped tha Heparin wit da kwickness.  And then I got the CT:

     

     embolism-fig1

    Yeah, "holy shit" is right.

     

    3.  Subvalvular Hypertrophic obstructive cardiomyopathy, Eisenmenger’s Syndrome, aberrant coronary arteries, therapeutic hypothermia, Broken Heart Syndrome: the pathology here is insane.  I treated some massive MIs that would cause a red-alert-fire-drill at most other hospitals but barely raises an eyebrow here.  It’s been a hard month, but I’m very glad that I matched here.  Nothing spells gratification like shocking a patient out of torsades arrest three times in one night and watching him survive to discharge fully functional.

     

     

    4.  Nothing at work, however, would be satisfying if my life outside of work were not a good experience.  July, for me, was a month to build my arsenal of recipies.  I haven’t eaten out for dinner once this entire month.  No, I’ve managed to cook dinner for myself every night, despite my busy schedule. I’ve got the most fantastic recipes on earth, and I eat like a prince.

     

    Two nights ago, I made Chicken with caramelized onions and sun-dried tomato on whole wheat pita:

     100_0106

    And, how did it taste?  Fucking delicious.

     100_0107

     

    Last week, I made filet cutlets sautéed in extra virgin and thyme:

     100_0110

    And, how did it taste?  Fucking delicious.

     100_0111

     

    The week before that, I made ham Panini on 50-calorie flatbread.

     100_0112

    And, how did it taste?  Fucking delicimafuckinfkja;kous.

     

    Thusly, the conclusion you should draw inevitably from this post is that I, clearly, am better than you.

     

    *wink.

       

  • Visit PrufrocksRevenge's Xanga Site
    • Name: Let's use no names.
    • Birthday: 11/17/1981
    • Gender: Male
    • Member Since: 12/24/2005
  • Nicknames: Sauce
  • Nationality: I'm a bit confused about that, sorry.
  • Religion: Religion is the opiate of the masses. (And it’s about time I smoked up)
  • Heroes: The Phantom of the Opera, John Keats, Mozart, and Achilles
  • Interests: Pre-1960 American and British literature (especially the British Romantics), elitism, sensible non-pedantic literary criticism, octopi, mythology, cuisine, medicine, biochemistry, pathophysiology, Wu da pian, Johnny Walker Black, opera, Beethoven, Van Gogh, Waterhouse, Renoir, Michelangelo, Bernini, Mozart, History, philosophy, candlelight, Dennis Miller, Ethos, logos, pathos, movies, movies, movies, bar-lounging, classical Freudian psychology, turtles, wine, Cicero, traveling, meeting new people and then dismissing them for their stupidity and/or vulgarity, body language, chocolate, intellectual or psuedointellectual or quasi-psuedointellectual conversation, swimming, boating, fishing, waterskiing, diving, snowboarding, quiet evenings, criminal minds, bawdy comedy, and the mysteries of life.
  • Expertise: Neurotic self-absorption, transubstantiation, cynicism, sarcasm, procrastination, pursuing the antithetical self, justifying the purposeless pursuit of the antithetical self, being ridiculous, Neverwinter Nights 2, human nature, reading Harrison’s, lamenting the decline of Western civilization, lamenting the bastardization of Eastern civilization, long walks in the rain, oversleeping, sonnets, villanelles, and other forms of archaic rhyme, love, hatred, the analysis of love and hatred, dichotomous point-counterpoint expression, vengeance, marginally inappropriate humor, selective empathy, romanticized decadence, British Romanticists, the subtleties of romance, making nicknames, putting three years of Latin to poor use, Chinese-American feng-shui gerbil diaspora, personifying my subconscious, arguing with my subconscious, conquering my subconscious, sexual innuendo, catharsis, memorizing power-point factoids, solipsism, passion, seduction, self indulgence, and imagining a better world.
  • Occupation: Medical Student
  • Industry: Medical Studentry
  • Favorite Movies: A Streetcar Named Desire, Requiem for a Dream, Freeway, Don Juan Demarco, Rebel Without a Cause (though he has no cause, he does have a cool jacket), Last of the Mohicans, Waking the Dead, The Glass Menagerie, Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves and also of big permed ‘80’s hair, Beauty and the Beast and the Fact that Gaston was demonized by an unfair portrayal.
  • Movies I can watch over and over: Wild Things, Wild Things, Mask of Zorro, and Wild Things
  • Actor that would play me in a movie: Antonio Banderas (a Chinese version)
  • Where I shop: 5th Ave. (But then I wake up and find myself at the GAP)
  • Brands I love: Red Bull, Windex, Pilot G2, Squaresoft, Kirkland Signature (Okay, maybe I really am Chinese)
  • I like to wear: boxer-briefs.
  • Can't live without: Na+ K+ ATPase
  • Prized Possessions: My Goljan's pathology bible
  • Guilty Pleasure: Telemundo

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